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Wednesday, December 01, 2004

TITLE:ERMx....
Time:2.19am
DAte:30th Nov 2004
I did something really horrifying today n god is gonna punish me for this! I LIED! YEs... i did! DARling... I'm gonna APOLOGISED it right here right now.. I'm really very sorry abt the whole issue today.. itx really my fault... n BLAME me..please DO! Well.. people in my MSN will defintely see that phrase for my nick as "I finally found the right guy to live with!" and i'm gonna tell u peepx the real reason behind this sentance! Though it may b STUPID and HURTING still.. i think TOUCHING is the right word to describe it! MY DEAREST frenx may never know the right FELICIA for i am always CHANGING! I can b very nasty n also sweet but how can u get my SWEET side?? Hmx... itx definitely by not irritate me! Never a fren can be close to me cause girls cant tolerate me much n GUYS.. well.. they hate me... or they love me and thus... NOT A TRUE FRENSHIP in the end! I feel lonely in this world filled with unexpected news and i seriously detest it loadx! Is it really so difficult to grab a true frenship? Why cant i just find a person whom i can rely on and shoot all my problems too without any fear? Why GUYS can never be just a fren to me?? WHY WHY WHY?? Having such a BIG QUESTION MARK in my life... well.... i just got one word to descibe it... SCREWED! Having thoughts that my very first real relationship can last long BUT... nehx.... that guy cheated my feelings! Not only my feelings that he hurt but also.. my whole damn IDIOTIC life! Life after that was even screwed cause there'z really no one whom i can trust especially guys and so.. I cant put myself in another relationship so fast! Though there was a chance for a new one BUT i chose to give it up and I certainly never regret it for he is now happy with his carefree life. After knowing my current bf.. as a FREN initially... I can proudly announce that my life was a 360 degree changed! He was the one who gain every trust and love back to me! Itx not that i'm proud or so watever... BUT which ever guy will get a girl a 100 over buckx necklace in within 2 weeks of relationship? WHO WOULD buy his gf a 40 over buckx skirt in within 3 days of relationship?? N now... who would buy tons of present for just a FRIEND whom he know her for just 2 mthx? Many would think that he's young... childish... ignorent and even bad looking but... HELLO... he'z mine! TO me... even though he isnt the perfect guy STILL.... i find his lurve care, concern, words and even heart is so much more perfect than anyone else! PEOPLE! LOOK HERE! Nothing in this world is so perfect.. though u may think that u're still young n that u shouldn't be committed to one relationship so fast.. THEN tell me.. when will b the right time? When the AGE is aready OVER? So wat are u going to do now?? FLirt all over n have a super carefree life? I'm already 18.. n soon the big 2 is coming... n once i'm 20... AGE just BOOM even without u knowing! N before u realise that u're 25... n everyone is getting married whereas u're not.. you start to get worried!! ITx always the CASE alright!!

My post for today.. is to Announce clearly that... in a relationship.. there is definitely obsticals and u cant just give up when u think that u're failing! Love is hard to be trusted and thus if YOU think that u got the right partner... try to understand him n treasure him for u gonna really regret seeing him/her holding someone elses hand in a wedding celebration with the big name up there! "I finally found the right guy to live with" will always b in my mind no matter wat! N for those who dunno who is the GUY still... hahaha...... u should noe.. la!



Wednesday, December 01, 2004